BEHOLD, THE ULTIMATE IGGY AZALEA ALBUM IS HERE (well it’s not technically but still)

Iggy Azalea is better when she gets people to sing on her songs.

See.

Go on, tell me I’m right.

In an ideal world, she’d release an album of songs with other people. And by ‘other people’, I mean the people below.

Iggy Azalea (feat. Tinashe and Big Sean)

‘Female rapper collaborates with paper-thin vocalist and brings a male rapper along for the ride’ is as story almost as old as time itself, but a ‘Big Ignashe’ would be incredible. DJ Mustard on the production duties and you have a skyscraper-sized slut jam. In terms of the video, it should just be Tinashe dancing for 4 minutes with Iggy and Big Sean on the side. Perhaps a wrestling ring-type scenario, with Iggy and Big Sean exchanging bars (instead of punches), with Tinashe doing a dance over her verse.

Iggy Azalea (feat. Angel Haze)

They’ve done it once, they may as well do it again.

Iggy Azalea (feat. Melissa Steel)

‘Paper-thin vocals’ is my third favourite genre of music (after ‘slutjamz’ and ‘songs to cry dance to’), and it’s a theme that will continue through this blog. Iggy’s two biggest hits worldwide are ‘Fancy’ and ‘Black Widow’ (well, in a few months anyway), so why try anything different. Much like a fart on the tube, it’s hard to pinpoint exactly where Melissa Steel came from, but with two songs doing the business on iTunes, it looks like she might linger for a bit (in the best way possible). So Iggy might as well.

Iggy Azalea (feat. Gorgon City)

Who doesn’t love a dance-tinged banger? [Answer: Iggy Azalea, probably]

Iggy Azalea (feat. Gwen Stefani)

This would probably be about being a strong blonde woman with a penchant for red lipstick. Throw in the leader of the Gwen Stefani fan club Rita Ora and you have a mammoth pop song. Something along the lines of the ‘Beautiful Liar’ video would be ideal, with all three wearing the same thing to confuse those of us with poor eyesight.

Iggy Azalea (feat. Brooke Candy and Kylie Minogue)

Remember when Kylie was meant to be making her comeback with ‘Get It Up Ya’? Well, the anthem for suffers of erectile disfunction may not even exist, but if it does, it was probably cut for not sounding enough like a Jessie J song. So they may as well give it to Iggy. But then again, it may not even be an actual thing.

Iggy Azalea (feat. M.I.A)

One massive #twerking anthem, tbh. Should probably include a Daphne and Celeste sample.

Iggy Azalea (feat. Ariana Grande and Charli XCX)

Iggy Azalea, Ariana Grande and Charli XCX are the best girl group in the world right now. Pop doesn’t get much better than ‘Problem’ and ‘Fancy’. A proper Iggy, Ariana and Charli collaboration would probably bring about world peace [disclaimer: it wouldn’t, but it’d be a fucking incredible pop song]. Show me an Ariana or Charli song that is less than a 7.5/10 and you’ll win a prize (excluding ‘Better Left Unsaid’, which doesn’t exist to these ears).

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