POP EMERGENCY: Fifth Harmony are about to cock up any chance of a UK hit

Fifth Harmony

Potentially very good girlband Fifth Harmony are coming to the UK. Which is ideal really to fill time between now and G.R.L releasing ‘Lighthouse’. They’re performing on The X Factor in a couple of weeks time, but apparently plans have changed and they are now performing (and releasing) ‘Bo$$’ instead of ‘Sledgehammer’.

Which is just wrong.

Pros of ‘Bo$$’

  • It’s more instantly recognisable on the radio.
  • It sounds like it’s trying to be a debut ‘pop moment’ (it fails, but at least they tried something different).
  • There’s a whiff of ‘Gentleman’ by The Saturdays here.

Cons of ‘Bo$$’

  • They’ve been plugging it for months and it has fuck all.
  • I watched the VMA pre-show with my sister earlier this year. She’s a casual pop fan but she laughed at them when they performed this. Now, I’m not saying that people will laugh, but this song is a bit stupid.
  • It wouldn’t be played on Heart, which is ‘the theme’ of this year’s X Factor.
  • Too much of a grower to be pushed without radio play.

Pros of ‘Sledgehammer’

  • It sounds like something Heart would play. In fact, it sounds like something ‘radio’ would play. It has, being played five more times than ‘Bo$$’ in the last month.
  • The chorus hits you like a sledgehammer.
  • I know popstars shouldn’t play it safe because it didn’t work for Pixie Lott (et al) but here FIFTH HARMONY REALLY NEED TO PLAY IT SAFE AND HAVE A HIT BEFORE GIVING US WEIRD SHIT.
  • It doesn’t need an X Factor performance to sell it, but it would be nice.
  • It’s an 8.5/10, whereas Bo$$ is a 7/10.

Cons of ‘Sledgehammer’

  • It’s written by Meghan Trainor (ugh).
  • It sounds like something G.R.L would release, which is good because ‘Ugly Heart’ did well here but it does nothing to create an easily identifiable Fifth Harmony ‘brand’.

What I’m trying to say is they should go back to ‘Sledgehammer’, have a hit with it, and then release ‘Bo$$’ in February when there is less competition. Or ideally, ‘Sledgehammer’ as the single, ‘Bo$$’ as the b-side.

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